Any news?!!
Once upon a time, a measly month or so into marriage, out would pop the naughty smile and pesky question from the ever meddling Great Indian Public, “Any news?”
What the?! Just tie the knot and start making babies? Hallo, there is a huge bridge to be crossed between making babies and becoming parents. Obviously the former can be done by anyone who has biologically progressed in life; na, nah…not the latter. C’mon these aren’t good ol’ times, when parenting came instinctively…when moms and dads knew how to be...moms and dads.
Oh no, no, no…now we’ve truckloads of experts…child psychologists, early childhood specialists, neo-natal growth consultants and who else… breathing down nouveau parental necks….often about how a good ‘talking to’ can tarnish tender minds. No scolding, no reprimands, treat them like adults...blah, blah, blah. But these days, the experts are swinging right back, saying parents must not be friends, but parents…sigh...what a complication! As though all this expert advice was not enough to topple you into utter parental confusion, innumerable aunties and the Great Indian Public also join the expert gang, shoveling their own "tried-and-tested" home-made parenting tips down your feebly protesting throat.
In fact, quite a few trusting New-Age parents (the kind who turn to webmd.com for medical advice in the middle of the night), who themselves had been brought up quite firmly, had swung to the ‘expert’ end of the pendulum and started mollycoddling their babies (usually the hapless first born!) But thankfully, by the time the second one (or two or three!) came along, the first one would have taught the parents enough to chuck the 'experts' and the aunties out of the window and take parental control into their own capable hands…back to trusting good ol' parental instincts!
hey, good to see u back in action!
ReplyDeleteso true! i was bombarded with so much advice, that i had no idea what to do with my first born. Now, I am a veteran of a full 5 years and handle my 2 year old with elan!
This happens not only in India. I think it happens whenever a new mother is spotted. People itch to advise and it's up to us to take the best and ignore the rest. Of course, the catch is we wouldn't know the difference (!) until we actually wet our hands.
ReplyDeleteI don't remember having given my parents a tough time while growing up. But it certainly is hard times for me now, bringing up my own. Like you said, hopefully we'll eventually find our own ways and means of doing it.
ReplyDeleteBut things are a-changing! I've been married for 7 years and I am enjoying my child-free existence. And I think folks back home have kinda given up...they no longer ask me..phew! Thank Him!
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ReplyDeleteIts a pleasure to read your blog, like reading the Reader's Digest.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work.
You haven't mentioned mom-in-laws...mine used to categorically over rule me by declaring that she has mothered TWO kids. Thankfully, she dropped that line when I had my third baby!!
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