Yogic driving

A car is a waste of money in Singapore. The public transport system is simply terrific. But for a family of seven (count in the maids too) public transport became rather difficult when cabbies started scrunching their skeptical eyebrows on seeing the entire brigade approaching. So we blew 90K S'pore dollars on a rambling 8-seater Honda Odyssey. That could have got us a Lexus in the US (sigh!) Anyways, we were shuttling around in our new found freedom which guzzled a hot $90 of petrol a week. Nothing seemed amiss till we noticed we were getting a mere 6 km for every liter of the golden liquid. What the?!

The spouse’s mechanical engineering soul (long lost to the banking industry) reared its head and preached a new philosophy – yogic driving. Practice principles of yoga while driving. First, take a deep breath. Chant silently to yourself…"I am not in the rat race. I am going to drive at my own sweet pace, without obstructing traffic or causing any serious harm to anybody."

Inhale deeply (of course, am hoping you’ve exhaled after the last one), start the engine and idle it. It’s like the long walk in the morning you know is good for you, but have never really got around to taking. It gets the blood flowing through the veins and the adrenaline pumping. So give your engine, I mean the car’s, a good morning walk. Idle it and let the oil pulse through its veins (or wherever it’s supposed to pulse through).

Accelerate slowly, oh ever so slowly, like you are stepping on a petal (no, that’s not a spelling mistake…it is 'petal' and not 'pedal'). Reach a decent speed, somewhere slightly below the speed limit and ease off the accelerator. Coast. Maintain speed. Use cruise control.

Good job! Now you are in the signature pose…the coasting asana. Do not accelerate or brake unnecessarily. All movements should be fluid and languid. When you approach a red signal, let go off the accelerator…watch the speed drop from 50kmph to 40 to 30 to 20 and coast to a gentle stop. Royally ignore the driver who’s dashing from behind only to crash brake at the stop light. Often, by the time you finish coasting, the light would’ve turned green and you can continue with your asana!

On the highways, practise this with all the sanctity of a yogic pose. A Porsche might zip past at a 120kmph. A Beemer might boom by with a snooty glance at you. Ignore them. Resist that sweet urge to press down on the accelerator and show those creeps what a Honda Odyssey can do…well, actually not much. But that’s beside the point. Resist all wicked temptations to remorselessly crush the pedal.

Don’t get pulled into the rat race or in highway parlance, onto the fastest lane. Drive on the second fastest lane at or slightly below the speed limit. It might be a good idea to tag behind a truck moving at a decent speed. Logic is nobody wants to follow a truck, so you can coast along serenely, in uninterrupted yogic nirvana.

My spouse, the guru of yogic driving, has been enlightening depressed owners of petrol guzzlers, and stories of mileage moksha have started cruising in. As for us, a couple of weeks of yogic driving has pushed the measly 6km per liter to an impressive 10.5 and the weekly petrol bill has tumbled from a numbing 90 to a fabulous 50! So, take a deep breath, utter a little prayer of ‘Aanjaneya control’ and coast to a great mileage!

(STATUTORY WARNING: These techniques have been tested out on well maintained Singapore roads. Similar success cannot be guaranteed on roads badly in need of repair and in no circumstance must drivers test this out on such roads. In case somebody still wishes to experiment, this blog bears no responsibility for the outcome.)